


Too Hard to Say

by LyriaBlackFrost



Series: Gladnis Week 2018 [2]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Drunk Gladio, Fluff and Angst, Gladnis Week, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, brotherhood era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-21
Updated: 2018-08-21
Packaged: 2019-06-30 16:08:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15755160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyriaBlackFrost/pseuds/LyriaBlackFrost
Summary: Gladio never liked the parties held in Insomnia’s castle, but they were especially unnerving when he already had so much on his mind.Day 2: “Absolutely drunk” + “I’m here; it’s going to be okay” for the Gladnis week 2018.





	Too Hard to Say

**Author's Note:**

> Why choose a single prompt when you can mash two together?  
> I hope you enjoy it!

The parties held in Insomnia’s castle were an annoyance, to say the least.

Alright, maybe that was an exaggeration: there was plenty of tasty food and expensive drinks, enough to keep him occupied for some time. But Gladio had never been good at dealing with nobility — which was ironic, considering his own lineage. All those endless pleasantries and smiles could get on someone’s nerves given enough time, and he wasn’t that patient to begin with.

Besides, he was particularly moody that night, so, instead of socializing, he isolated himself with a plate of food and a few drinks, ignoring the world around to the best of his ability.

After some minutes of eating and playing a game in his phone, he noticed someone approach him through the corner of his eye, and wasn’t too surprised to see it was Ignis. As expected, he looked impeccable in his formal attire. However, there was a hint of exhaustion on his face only those who knew him well could identify. Not surprising, considering he probably had his part in organizing the event, and then had to go around, greeting and chatting with everyone as the representative of the prince himself — who, as usual, had chosen to stay home and ignore his duties.

Gladio felt bad for him.

“So, enjoying the party?” he asked in a playful tone.

Ignis stared at him, reaching for his glass, turning what was left of the drink in one go. Gladio raised his brow, a brief laugh escaping his lips.

“Well, that answers it.”

“My face is sore from smiling so much,” muttered Ignis. “I’m still smiling, am I not? I simply can’t stop… this is a nightmare.”

“Stay with me, Iggy,” Gladio pulled the chair beside him. “You went through worse things than this.”

“Perhaps,” Ignis sat down, taking out his glasses, massaging the area between his eyes. “But I’m still fairly certain that you’ll find my deceased corpse laying somewhere on the floor before the night ends.”

“I sure hope not, you’re the only thing keeping me from dying of boredom.”

Ignis laughed, putting his glasses again.

“I have to admit I’m surprised to find you alone,” he said. “Isn’t it against some rule of the Amicitia’s family to stay unaccompanied for more than two minutes in any public event?”

“I think I scared any possible company away with my face.”

Gladio gestured towards the wound on his left eye, that he gained protecting Noctis from a bunch of assholes. Most of the stitches had already come out, which meant he now could move his face without feeling like the cut was opening again. But the scar was still evident, and he’d be lying if he said all the curious and surprised looks didn’t bother him.

“And I believed what they said, about girls liking scars…” he added with a humorous tone.

But Ignis didn’t laugh at his attempt of a joke, observing him with a worried expression. Gladio averted his eyes.

“Is it healing well?” asked Ignis.

“Yeah, but I’m pretty sure this one won’t fade with time.”

“Do you mind?”

Gladio looked at him, unsure of what he meant by that. Ignis carefully reached for his face, touching the area close to the scar with the tip of his fingers, examining it.

“I’ve said this before, but I’m glad it didn’t get your eye.”

“Yeah…”

Ignis retreated. They stayed silent for the following seconds, until a wave of nervousness made a brief, humorless laugh escape from Gladio’s lips.

“It’s ugly, isn’t it?” he asked.

“Believe me, they would have to make a bigger effort to make you look ugly.”

Gladio didn’t reply immediately. Moments like that made him wonder if Ignis’ words and touch meant something more than a close friendship, or if he was just reading too much into it.

“If you’re the one saying so…”

They changed the subject to more pleasant things. The time passed, and at some point Gladio found his father amid the crowd, standing beside King Regis, as expected from a Shield. Despite the professional smile, the old man looked tired as well. It seemed parties weren’t among the Amicitias’ favorite pastimes. Except, maybe, for Iris… Gladio was sure that little monkey would find a way to enjoy herself, no matter the situation. He smiled fondly at the thought.

His eyes met Regis’, who raised his hand in a subtle gesture to call his attention.

“Iggy…”

Gladio touched his elbow, indicating the King with a movement of his head. Regis made a sign for Ignis to approach him.

“Seems like your break is over…” said Gladio.

“Please, end my life,” muttered Ignis as he stood up.

Gladio watched as he walked away, then stretched his legs under the table. The waiter passed by, and he grabbed two glasses of champagne, one for himself and other for Ignis.

Maybe he should go take a walk outside? He considered it for a while, but decided to wait until Ignis got back. He’d rather have someone to talk to, anyway. It would make time pass faster, and in a more pleasant way.

Gladio finished drinking his champagne. Long minutes passed before he started to drink from the other glass. He could always get another for Ignis later.

Speaking of Ignis, Gladio spotted him in the distance, among a small group of older people, with his perfect posture and fake smile. _It was so damn fake_ … How couldn’t anyone notice it?

He laughed to himself, finishing the drink. Wasn’t drinking alone such a depressing thing, though? The highest point of his night had been the few minutes he got to spend with Ignis. Now that he thought about it, that party wouldn’t have been so bad if he got to spend more time with him. He could even get to enjoy it.

He finished that drink, and when a waiter approached him again, he took another two glasses. Hope never dies, right?

Gladio kept waiting, but there was no sign of Ignis coming back. He glanced around the place, but his friend had vanished amid the crowd. _Great_ , his last bit of entertainment was gone.

As time passed, a feeling of restlessness overcame him. Maybe he should have taken that walk, after all… But he wasn’t feeling like doing it anymore. Besides, if he started wandering alone, he’d go back to feeling self-conscious about his damn face. He knew it was part of his job as a Shield to protect Noctis with his life, and he was fine with it. He was proud of it. But he also didn’t imagine something that small… That stupid, could bother him so much.

Once again, he drank the champagne from Ignis’ glass, and it tasted bitter on his tongue. Noctis had cried at the hospital… He never saw the brat react like that before, and part of him felt guilty about it. Ignis was there too. He spent more time than he should at his bedside, when he probably had more important things to do. Just stood there, listening to his endless whining and trying to keep him distracted. That’s when he began to wonder if Ignis felt something for him — and when he realized he was hoping that was the case.

The lights at the party seemed brighter than before, and he foresaw a nasty headache on the next morning. He noticed the waiter approaching his table again, and hesitated for just a second before calling him with a gesture. Again, he took two glasses, but this time they were both for himself.

“ _Well, I’m already fucked up… Why stop now?”_

That was a terrible way of thinking, but, honestly, he was too tired to care.

 

* * *

 

After being introduced and having to sustain a conversation with at least a dozen different people, Ignis finally managed to slip away. He was good at socializing, yes, but it didn’t mean he _liked_ doing it. Especially when he was that tired and with a more than inconvenient headache. Maybe it was a sign that he should start sleeping better.

If he had to be honest, the only pleasant thing to come out of that night was the chance to spend some time with Gladio. Not that it was such an unusual thing, especially considering that they trained together almost every day. But for them to meet outside of Insomnia’s castle, without the excuse of accompanying Noctis somewhere, was quite unusual. And he enjoyed it. Probably more than he should.

He made his way back to Gladio’s table, and in seconds his optimistic expectancy was dissolved into something closer to dread. It was clear Gladio had been drinking — way more than he was supposed to. He wasn’t causing a scene, but had a grouchy expression, and would glare at anyone who looked in his direction. Ignis approached the table with cautious steps, but as soon as Gladio saw him, a smile appeared on his face.

“You finally got back…” he said. “I was starting to think I’d have to drink your share again.”

“Gladio,” Ignis carefully took the glass out of his hand, placing it out of his reach. “I understand that you don’t like parties, but I think you had enough for today.”

“It’s not that bad, once in a while,” Gladio shrugged. “If we have to go through this shit, then we better make the best out of it, right?”

“That’s not the issue here.”

Ignis sat beside his friend, hoping no one called him this time. He was sure that, if left alone, Gladio would just go back to drinking.

“You should be thanking me…” answered Gladio. “This way you’ll have an excuse to leave early.”

“It’s not much of an improvement, leaving early just to take care of a drunk man.”

“Really?” Gladio showed a suggestive smile. “I’m sure we could have much more fun on our own than in this place.”

Somehow, Ignis managed to keep a straight face at those words.

“I’ll pretend you didn’t say what you just did.”

Gladio laughed for a while, then looked at Ignis’ eyes, his face resting against his palm.

“You’re really beautiful, you know?”

That sudden comment made Ignis stare at him.

“Excuse me?”

“I never tell you that, but you’re so damn beautiful…” proceeded Gladio. “And so fucking smart. Man, you’re just amazing.”

His voice was loud, and drawing more than a few curious eyes to them.

“I appreciate the thought,” said Ignis, “but maybe you should lower your tone.”

“Why?” Gladio elevated his voice even more, getting up from his chair, glaring at the guests around them, as if daring them to keep looking. “So these people won’t judge me? They already look at me like I’m some kind of ugly monster, so why should I care? Why should I care about any of this?”

“Gladio…”

Ignis placed his hand on Gladio’s shoulder, trying to calm him down. But it was clear that he wasn’t feeling well. He had never been one to drink until he lost his senses, and that was what worried Ignis the most.

“I’ll take you home,” he muttered, placing his arm around Gladio’s waist, guiding him to the exit.

Gladio accompanied him, grumbling at anything in their way. Ignis went straight to his car, helping Gladio sit on the passenger’s seat, taking his place beside him. He hadn’t drunk much, but still drove slowly for safety measure. They reached Gladio’s place, where he’d been living alone since he moved from the Amicitia’s mansion. It took some effort to take him out of the car, and even more to drag him to his apartment on the fifth floor. There, Ignis had to search his pockets for the keys, hearing a few comments from Gladio about him “trying to grab his ass”. He just took a deep breath and helped him walk inside.

The place was messier than Ignis remembered, as if Gladio hadn’t taken his time to clean for at least a week.

“I’m gonna puke…” he announced, suddenly.

“By the six, Gladiolus!”

Ignis tried to guide him to the bathroom as fast as he could, but there was still a trail of vomit left behind them. Gladio proceeded to empty his stomach in the toilet, while Ignis held him by the shoulders, making sure he didn’t lose his balance.

“Feeling better?” he asked.

“I guess…”

There was vomit on his clothes, and Ignis couldn’t just leave him in that state.

“I’ll help you take a shower,” he said.

With some effort, he managed to free Gladio from his dirty clothes, dropping them on the floor, together with his own jacket — which, at that point, was only staying in the way. He turned on the shower, waiting until the water became warm, guiding Gladio to it. Once he felt the water on his body, he grunted, trying to leave.

“You need to clean yourself,” said Ignis in a patient tone.

Gladio tried to leave again, but Ignis stood in his way.

“Gladiolus Amicitia,” he said in a serious voice. “Stop being difficult and allow me to help you.”

Maybe because of Ignis’ tone, or maybe because he simply got tired to fight back, Gladio stayed put, under the shower. Ignis felt a cold shiver, and realized his clothes were drenched.

“Hey…” Gladio’s voice called his attention. “Do friends usually do stuff like this?”

“Like what?”

“Undressing each other, being together under the shower… Y’know, this stuff.”

Ignis took a deep breath. Of course he was conscious of the situation, but he couldn’t let that stop him. There were more important things than his own personal feelings to worry about.

“You’re aware that I wouldn’t need to do any of this if you hadn’t drunk more than you should, right?” he asked back.

“Way to put the blame on me…”

“Except you were to blame from the start. Drinking like that, and all else.”

Ignis turned off the shower, helping Gladio walk out of it, quickly drying his body with a towel. He guided him back to the room, carefully avoiding the vomit on the floor, walking Gladio to the bed, making him sit there as he got some clothes from his wardrobe. He found some difficulty in convincing Gladio to wear pants, but somehow managed to do it. When he tried to put a t-shirt on him, though, Gladio leaned on him, almost making him fall under his weight.

“Ignis…” said Gladio in a low tone. “You know how I feel about you, right?”

Ignis lowered his eyes, letting out a deep, tired sigh.

“I don’t think we should have this conversation now,” he said, carefully pulling Gladio away from him.

Gladio cursed under his breath.

“You’re so complicated…”

“Says the one who can barely stand on his own. Come on, raise your arms.”

Gladio did as he said, and soon he was fully clothed again. Ignis helped him lay on the bed, and only then started to pay attention to his own clothes.

“I can’t go back like this,” he searched the wardrobe for something he could wear. “I’ll borrow some of your clothes, if you don’t mind.”

“Or you could just spend the night here,” suggested Gladio.

“I think I had enough of you for tonight.”

“You could never have enough of me,” he laughed. “You’re even taking my clothes.”

“Is it even worth it to remind you of the reason?”

Ignis took the smallest pair of pants he could find and a hoodie. They were comfortable, but, as expected, way too big for him. He turned to face Gladio, who was gawking at him, bitting his lower lip.

“I just discovered a new kink…” he muttered.

Ignis counted to ten and asked the Astrals for patience. He reminded himself that Gladio wasn’t his normal self at the moment, and that he shouldn’t get mad at him. He approached Gladio, placing a pillow under his head, covering him with a blanket.

“I’m hungry…” he grumbled.

Ignis sighed.

“Alright, I’ll make something for you.”

He went to the kitchen, searching it, realizing both the fridge and the food cabinet were equally devoid of anything he could use to make a proper meal. There was, however, a few Cup Noodles and some other pre-made food on the shelves. Didn’t that man eat anything but that? He made a mental note to discuss the matter when he was sober again.

Without many options, Ignis prepared one of the Cup Noodles, approaching the bed when it was ready.

“Gladio…” he called.

But Gladio had fallen asleep. Ignis simply looked at him for a moment, deciding not to wake him.

“And you say I am the complicated one…”

He placed the Cup Noodles on the counter, and proceeded to clean the floor and put the dirty clothes on a bowl with water. He should clean them as soon as possible, but he was _tired_. He just wanted to lay on his bed and have a long night of sleep.

But, as tempting as the thought was, he knew nothing good could come from leaving his friend alone in that state. After a minute of consideration, Ignis took a chair, placing it beside Gladio’s bed.

“ _It’ll be a long night…”_ he thought.

 

* * *

 

Gladio woke up with his head aching. His mind was foggy, and he could remember little more than brief fragments from the prior night. He looked beside him, seeing Ignis there, sitting on a chair with the glasses on his lap, asleep.

“Iggy?”

His low voice was enough to wake him up. He looked at Gladio, putting his glasses again.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

“Like shit…” admitted Gladio. “My head is killing me.”

Ignis got up, stretching his back. It crossed Gladio’s mind that the chair wasn’t among the most comfortable places to spend the night.

“Where do you keep the medicine?” asked Ignis.

“Bathroom. Cabinet.”

Ignis walked to the bathroom. He came back seconds later, approaching the sink, filling a glass with water.

“Here,” he said, offering Gladio the glass and the pill. Gladio drank it, and the cold water, more than anything, made him feel a little better.

“What time is it?” he asked.

“Little past three in the morning,” Ignis took the glass from him, placing it in the sink.

“Shit…” he felt a sting of guilt in his chest. “You’ve been here all this time?”

“I couldn’t leave you alone in that state.”

Gladio closed his eyes, trying to force his memory. Things started to come back to him, and he soon wished they didn’t.

“Are you hungry?” asked Ignis, calling his attention. “You fell asleep before you could eat.”

“Ah, yeah… But—”

“Besides, you really should buy something other than instant noodles to eat,” Ignis interrupted him. “You’re as bad as Noct when I leave him alone for a few days.”

Gladio smiled, but the guilt soon made the expression fade.

“Sorry,” he said.

Ignis didn’t say anything, approaching his bed when the food was ready. Gladio ate in silence, only then realizing how hungry he was feeling. As soon as he finished, Ignis sat on the border of the mattress, looking at him with a serious expression. Gladio averted his eyes.

“I think we should talk about what happened,” said Ignis.

“Iggy, I’m really so—”

“Stop, Gladio. I’m not asking for you to apologize, I just want to know what’s wrong.”

Gladio stayed silent, avoiding his gaze.

“You’re not one to drink carelessly like that,” insisted Ignis. “There’s something bothering you, isn’t there?”

Silence again.

“Gladio…” Ignis placed a hand on his arm. “Please, talk to me.”

Gladio hesitated, not sure of how to start putting his thoughts into words.

“I don’t know,” his voice was little more than a mutter. “I’m just thinking too much.”

“About what?”

He made another pause. Ignis waited.

“I never thought too much about it, being a Shield and all. But after what happened…” he touched the end of his scar. “I realized I could just… I don’t know…” he pressed his lips together for a moment. “Die, any day, just like that.”

That word felt like a stone on his chest, but after saying it out loud, it became easier to proceed.

“It was such a stupid fight, and still… It made me realize it’s not because I’m a Shield that I’m invincible. It should be obvious, but… I never thought about it before. Being a Shield doesn’t mean I’ll always be able to protect Noct. I can fail at this… I can die, and then there’ll be no one to protect him.” His throat felt dry. “He was crying so much at the hospital, I didn’t know what to do. It… It made me think of Iris. If anything happened to me, she’d cry like that too, and it’d be my fault.”

He felt tears in his eyes, and tried to hide them with a nervous laugh.

“I’m not making any sense, am I?”

“That’s not true,” said Ignis. “It’s alright, Gladio… I understand.”

Gladio didn’t answer, his own words still echoing on his mind. He clenched his fists, all of those thoughts suddenly feeling like too much to bear.

“I’m scared…”

As soon as he said it, something broke inside him and he started to cry. Ignis put his arm around his shoulders, bringing him closer, hugging him. Gladio leaned his head against his chest.

“It’s alright…” muttered Ignis to him, caressing his hair. “I’m here with you… It’s going to be alright.”

Gladio didn’t know for how long he stayed like that, but when he finally calmed down, he felt exhausted. It was like he had cried away every single feeling that was inside his chest, and now he felt strangely empty. Lighter.

“Sorry…” he said after a while. “I think I needed to let all this shit out.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m just glad you talked to me.”

He looked at Ignis, offering him a light smile.

“I don’t think I’d be able to talk about all this with anyone else.” He hesitated for a second, then reached for Ignis face, gently caressing it. “Thanks for listening.”

Ignis smiled back, placing his hand over Gladio’s, holding it against his face.

“Iggy…”

“Hm?”

“Can you stay with me?”

“Of course.”

They lay beside each other, their bodies close, legs entwined. Ignis’ presence and warmth felt good. Comfortable. Calming.

For the first night in a long time, Gladio felt completely at peace.

**Author's Note:**

> I made Iggy cry on my last one... Of course I had to do the same to Gladio this time.  
> Thanks for reading, I hope you liked it! :)


End file.
